Sunday, May 21, 2017

Fathers must be Aliens!

I remember mine didn't say a word when the world questioned me, but lost his wits when I came home late,
He forgot to have me learn how to cook, but appreciated every amoeba-shaped chapati I cooked,
He never forced me to live by his dreams, but I always found him backing me for mine,
He never shed a tear when my mom cried every day days before I wed,
But couldn't help take his handkerchief out when I was finally saying bye,
He never drafted the design of the life manual for me, but cried with me every time I failed,
He would never express himself out in the sun, but the fact that he's happy would make the world spin faster,
He wouldn't know personally the people I loathe, but he would become my mirror the moment he would see them first,
Fathers must be aliens, for they just don't behave the way normal people do,
They become the wind beneath the wings and also the storm, because that's what they do! 

Image Credit: http://cache2.artprintimages.com/p/LRG/37/3719/A7MAF00Z/art-print/james-wiens-father-and-daughter-time.jpg 

Saturday, August 6, 2016

The Birthday Dilemma

I safely landed in my late twenties last Wednesday and I must say the wisdom coming with ageing is nowhere close to what I had imagined it would be when I was far too young to look at this age with awe. This moment, this very second while I breathe and type this out, I have realized how time is tricking me into ageing while my brain is not budging from the status quo. It’s all in the mind, as they say, I realize how people take ages to grow up, while their body timeclock happily ticks away their minutes left to live.

I see people getting overtly crazy by the idea of celebrating the weekends, but I am also amazed thinking how living life by the weekends is leaving them with only four chances to ‘actually live’ every month. The rest of the time, they were just striking days off the calendar doing the stuff they call their routine. This was dark!

Never mind, while I'm still trying to fit in to the world of ‘grownups’ now, there are a few shocking acceptances that I have made, that I never thought I would but never did I know that I would be given options to choose from. Growing up is, indeed, funny and it gets sexier with age!

Aunty: You have got to make friends with this salutation, if you’re like me, a still-young girl in her late twenties. Kids do not know what to call you, because their moms, who you hang out with, are already planning their second. You cannot be the kids’ ‘rakhi sister’ because you just don’t fit in; hence, aunty.

Hola books!
: They will be the sanest, safest, most interesting piece of wisdom you will ever come across. Besides, they don’t judge you and, yes, they don’t care.

Learn to earn: For a girl like me who belongs to the digital media space, learning never really stops – the sooner you accept this, the better. You’ll grow stale in the industry if you let your knowledge stay buried in your closet.

Tyaag-balidaan: Sometimes you would stop and wonder if it's really you, but trust me, having reached at this stage and this point in life, I DO think about my parents and spouse before I actively think about myself, be it in any front. I wouldn’t call it tyaag-balidaan per se, but hell yeah, it does feel like it and it silently engulfs your way of thinking in entirety. Now you know why your mom is the way she is.

Kids, yes I want to PLAN: I remember talking with my girlies, while still in my teenage, on how we would be able to put this to our parents that ‘yes we did it, and yay, we have been successful’; it would just get so effing apparent. This concept kind of feels nauseating in early twenties, but I am amazed how things change. While you’re still riding double happily after initial years of marriage, you feel the need of the third. Gradually, you start feeling being a part of this universe, you might just have a darn serious role to play in Darwin’s theory of evolution!

Money is the lube: No love, no trust, no other bullshit can replace the power of this five-letter word. It could actually engulf all merry, madness and magic; yes, money matters.

There’s more to you: Why not keep surprising yourself with things you never knew you could do, talents you never knew you could acquire and skills you never knew you could master – there’s no age barrier to learning, after all.

An open heart: In the era where we live, nobody really cares what others think of his personal life, but trust me, he would silently want to seek support from people around him. Carrying an open heart and increased degree of acceptance would lead to way simpler lives of people around you and, of course, to you commanding great respect for yourself.

Some more ME time: I love the girls who love themselves, who take care of themselves – what they wear, how they look, how they carry themselves, the style, the attitude – the girls who actually give time to themselves. I love this section of the community. They do not know how they become an inspiration for millions, who want to become like them. Some time is all it takes!

Nobody cares: Yes! So, at the end of the day, the only person who needs to be happy, satisfied and content is the person I’m gonna be looking at every day in the mirror! Trust me, rest everyone is totally busy to even think about us. So, I would rather do the things which make me want to embrace myself and love myself a little more.
This concept of birthdays, the time passing and its sudden reminders look all too amusing; you know when the last second passed, but do not know how the last year did. Why not we all might as well be our happiest in these years tiptoeing by us?

Wednesday, January 27, 2016

So Much So

What’s the most tragic, disheartening, striking and yet the most satisfying sibling-feeling you’ll ever get? It’s, probably, losing them to a life partner they would eventually spend their lives with. For all the time you might have spent together, you might not have cared a bit and might have also taken their presence tad too casually, but it is at this point in life that you want to shed your outer, worldly self, to bare your naked soul to them, showing that you have always been that ‘first’ next to them. It is this, weirdly-emotional, crazy-yet-sorted phase that I am going through right now!

So, the grand news that it is the time for us, the family members to push my brother into a brand new life of ‘husbandship’ and see him transition through a fun boyhood to an even merrier manhood, all laughing through his learning phase. While we shall remain on the shore bidding him happiness, he shall embark on a fresh new sailing, in a direction unexplored, to a more-fulfilling life. Well, this had to happen one day, so, now.
*tears of happiness*.

Having spent around two and a half decades with my brother, living closely and sharing all the fabrics of life with him, I can say our companionship has really seen a lot. All through the journey, I would have come across zillions of shades of my brother, some funny, other grim, some possessive, while others I-don’t-give-a-damn, some rather secretive and others open-to-all, some very loving and others close to breaking a bone, some really supporting and others contradicting, a few caring publicly and a lot more caring very secretly – I have grown as a sister all this while, seeing him change, grow up to be a better human being.

From the time I remember I know him to the time he cried for me on phone just after a day after my marriage to now, when I miss him even more because of the distance, of course, every day carries equal substance in the pages of my memories. I can say I have spent some of the best and the most memorable moments of my life with this champ. In fact, our journey in life has been a lot familiar. Right from studying in the school together, crossing teenage to experiencing a new phase, called college, to further getting placed and earning money, we have tasted these struggles almost at the same time.

I so feel both of our lives are so interconnected and strongly influenced by each other’s that we both would, now, get married to spouses with a similar initial, “H”! What a great, darn coincidence!

Finally, a note to the protagonist here: I wish you be as good a companion as you’ve been a big brother! Congratulations for entering a new phase of life and thanks for getting us all a nice sister-in-law! I really hope we have zillions of times like these in store ahead!

*Love*

Monday, October 12, 2015

My first Varalakshmi Vratham

My story is one perfect example of amalgamation of two cultures, one from cosmopolitan Punjab and the other from traditional Andhra. Going by my instincts or love or spirit to marry my beau had gotten me into a new land of a new language, new cultures, new traditions and new ways of leading life. Needless to say, it has been an enriching experience which I would have deeply missed had I gotten hitched in my own community. I always had hots for South Indian guys and since college, I was pretty sure I am going to fall for one from the foreign land and no wonder, the fate!

So, now, I am a semi-Andhraiite, still trying to get my tongue twist on the tunes of Telugu words and training my taste buds for spicy, Andhra food. But the best part about this cross-cultural union is that I get to celebrate the bests of the festivals from the North as well as from the South. We had God’s grace shining on us, so we could celebrate my first Rakhi and get all the love from my family. A day before, I got to celebrate my first Varalakshmi Vratham and this experience was both divine as well as overwhelming for both of us.

Since I do not have any elder’s guidance on how things should be, I had to bank on my cousin sisters-in-law, Kanthi and Pallavi and one great bhabhi (vadina, as they say in Telugu), Rani. These guys helped me great deal to understand the festival and the values hidden in it and perform the pooja according to the rituals. The best anchor, my husband was always next to me to lead the way but yes, he never forced anything upon me, neither if I should fast nor if I should perform the pooja. It was my interest and excitement which he fueled further .

So, I had my new sarees in place, gold purchased (kasu) in place, a thoroughly cleaned and decorated mandir in place and all the raw ingredients required to prepare the prasadam the next morning right in place. One best aspect of participating in South Indian festivals is you get to purchase plenty of new clothes and jewelry all the time! Anyway, the next morning, I got up at 5:30 in the morning, took a shower, draped my new saree and set out to my kitchen to prepare the five dishes I had plan to cook. I must say I not only surprised myself but also my best friend and my husband who couldn’t believe I could do all this in one go.

I prepared the following – carrot kheer, lemon rice, rava kesari, Pongal and daddhojanam. By 9, I was all prepared and set for the pooja. This vratham is not exactly a tiring one, as you get to eat right after you perform the pooja. We performed our pooja at 11:40 in the morning and had food right after that. This pooja experience was calming and, also, brought us closer as a couple – we recited all the mantras in Sanskrit together and sung the Arti, too. Singing ‘Lakshmi Raave Maa Intiki’, I, not even once, felt like an outsider. For the first experience, this one was truly outstanding! The craze to wear a new saree, to eat all these tasty dishes, to wear new jewelry and, of course, to do things right was all the driving force behind, but by grace of Maa Lakshmi, I had the best first Varalakshmi Vratham ever!
Daddhojanam or Curd Rice
Lemon Rice
Carrot Kheer
Rava Kesari/Halwa

Pongal

Friday, August 21, 2015

My First Vlog Ever!

This Vlog is dedicated to my husband who just celebrated his first birthday after marriage and, boy, look at the happiness that spread!
 

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